Am sat at work at 9pm listening to “Arunchela Shiva” on my CD player, memories of chanting this in the yoga hall at the ashram and more memories of devotion to the divine come flowing into my mind —-xxxxx
Yoga at 7am every day for two weeks, scriptures and meditation after breakfast, chanting at 4pm. Walking to all the Shiva Lingam shrines along the road at the bottom of the Arunchela mountain, buying flower offerings, lighting wicks floating in ghee, smearing ash and red powder on forehead.
Walking up a path – up and up in the blistering heat – sweat pouring off me in rivers, a kind stranger paying for me to have a lemon soda with salt, from the girl selling it at the side of the path ( as I did not have rupees on me at that moment)- to a cave and then having a guide hold my hand as I struggle down a very steep rocky slope to the cave where Sri Ramana Maharishi lived and back up again ( nearly killed me) – I paid of course but was still very grateful.
Praying to shrines, sticking limes on spikes, being blessed by Priests, walking around shrines, temples small and big – elaborate, ornate, magnificent xxxxx
At the ashram the energy of Kali ripping apart the illusion and ego’s shrieking in horror xxxxx
Sai Baba’s eyes talking to me – seeing me – peeps cramming into narrow spaces in the temples – claustrophobic panic rising in me – breath breathe – devout – passionate – women in beautiful, coloured Saris, strange, mystical rituals, people living and breathing their faith……….young boys/trainee Priests chanting the Vedas – transporting me into BLISS – Priests bathing lingams with milk, syrup – anointing……Nataraja dancing the dance of Creation, Preservation and Destruction ….swirling and spiralling through the Galaxy and the Cosmos – reminds me of my invocation to the Goddess Danu for the Winter Solstice – ( derived from summat Kathy Jones wrote )- Arianrod of the Silver Wheel – swirling gracefully home to the Galactic Mother – the Grand designer of the web of life – we hear your call echoing through the Cosmos and ringing in out ears – we feel you stirring in us through creative expression and grace – spiralling and dancing with the web of life xxxxxx……………..xxxxxxxxxx
The Matrimundi – ” wants to be the symbol of the Divine’s answer to man’s aspiration for perfection. Union with the Divine manifesting in a progressive human UNITY” – walking towards it – feeling the energy change – softer, open, fresh and pure and BRIGHT tingling- seeing IT for the first time – a huge golden spaceship – filling us with AWE – and then the next day going inside – a Sci -fi adventure unfolding – soft, cool, light, pure, crystal and water – cleansing – meditating in a circle of just PURE SPACE – clearing, cleaning – all the heat, dust, bugs bugging – healing – bringing us into connection with source – allowing the light of the Universe to bathe and soothe us xxx special ?? off the scale !!!
ancient carvings, stone reliefs, DEITIES – the sunset over the Priests pool – bells summoning, primal stirring of drums – calling, summoning – beating, calling, flames waving through the air, Blessings, washing crystal lingams, reverence, powerful, fascination – trying to figure out what is going on with the rituals which seem short and fast and frequent – Brahmin priests looking like rock stars, one prostrating whilst on his mobile, picking his nose and grooming himself – feeling weary from the heat, tetchy, overwhelmed by heat, fucking mosquitos but an inner thrilling sensation driving you on – hustle, bustle, heat ( did I mention the heat) and hassle, being told to take your shoes off, pay for it, do not sit there, don’t stick your legs out – devotion all around you – feverish – Love ?? total fervent desire – hoping, praying, wanting, needing, believing – hoping for what ?? – to touch the eternal BLISS ?? – for the light to flood our senses, our body, our world – revealing itself ??
Wanting to slow down – connect to the energy ( so shrugging off fellow travellers ha ha ) – absorb the Peace of the temple in the evening – the divine energy of the stones holding centuries of worship ( 900 years) – this is why I came – the soft, eternal calm that I will hold in my heart when I return home – life eternal – Om IS where the heart is ha ha – soak up the energy – soothing my soulxxxxxxxxxxx
Making little videos with my Fred the Ted – choosing a location/backdrop and reading out from ” The Science of Self Realisation” by Satguru Sri Ramana Devi – feeling my inner spark ignited and then my heart glowing – I want to express my love for God/dess xxx and I find a statue of Shiva/Parvati which is ONE but half male and half female ( as the pic above) – the three main colours are a perfect match for the three main colours of my outfit – xx – I take this as a sign that I am now in balance with my masculine and feminine xxxx
Finding God/dess when I visit the Children’s home and animal sanctuary – deep suffering and LOVE in action xxxx innocence and beauty xx
” All your life must be an offering and a sacrifice to the Supreme, your only object in action shall be to serve, to receive, to fulfil, to become a manifesting instrument of the Divine Shakti in her works” The Mother, Sri Aurobindo xxxxxx
even more ancient temples – stone carvings – images of life – magickal communication from our ancestors – maybe beings from another planet came with pointy heads to create places of wonder, power, mystery and delight xxx
” A divine force shall flow through tissue and cell. And take the charge of the breath and speech and act. And all the thoughts shall be a glow of SUNS. And every feeling a celestial thrill…….. A sudden bliss shall run through every limb. And nature with a mightier presence fill. Thus shall the Earth open to divinity And common natures feel the wide uplift, Illumine common acts with the Spirit’s ray And meet the deity in common things. Nature shall live to manifest secret God, The spirit shall take up the human play, This earthly life become the life DIVINE” , ” Sri Aurobindo The Mother The advent of a New World” – I truly believe this is so xxxx
Me and Fred the Ted had an amazing ADVENTURE xxx
Ah well time to mop the kitchen floor ( one of my duties – lone support working at this point -in a residential support service for peeps with mental health issues) xxxxxxxxxxx